Anger and Rage A - Inner Fire Therapy

Discover How to Resolve Anger and Rage

Does this Sound Like Your Experience of Anger?

Which Means That…

Anger gets in the way of your relationships.

It’s hard to stay close to someone because you find yourself getting angry.

You disconnect from others as a way of keeping yourself and them safe.

“Growing up, I wasn’t allowed to be angry at home. When my parents were angry, they would throw things and scream at each other. As a result, I felt really uncomfortable with anger. He helped me become comfortable with my emotions, including anger, and to work with them in my life, rather than avoiding them. Now, when I feel angry, I know what to do and I don’t have to avoid it or stuff it down anymore.”

D.B.

What Really Causes Anger?

Anger is often a sign that your boundaries have been violated.

A boundary is where we determine what is okay for us and what is not okay.

Anger arises when someone crosses the boundary.

Anger gives us that energy to stand up for ourselves and maintain those boundaries.

How to Work with Anger

1.Identify what the boundary was that was crossed.

Examples:

Was it someone that said something to us that we found is respectful?

Was it getting cut off in traffic?

How to Work with Anger

1.Identify what the boundary was that was crossed.

Examples:

Was it someone that said something to us that we found is respectful?

Was it getting cut off in traffic?

2. Notice what needs to be done to maintain or shift those boundaries going forward.

As an example: speaking up to the person who said something that felt disrespectful to you.

“Anger used to take me over. I’d say things that I regretted later and which hurt my marriage. David helped me create more space inside and to not let my anger control me anymore. He also taught me valuable communication skills to more effectively connect with my wife. Now that I understand myself and my wife better, my marriage is way more relaxed.”

E.M.

What Really Causes Rage?

Rage happens when something in the present reminds you of a past, unresolved boundary violation or boundary violations, often many of them that occur over time in a very similar way.

As an example: someone speaking loudly to you reminds me of getting yelled at when you were a kid.

What Really Causes Rage?

Rage happens when something in the present reminds you of a past, unresolved boundary violation or boundary violations, often many of them that occur over time in a very similar way.

As an example: someone speaking loudly to you reminds me of getting yelled at when you were a kid.

As a result, maybe you have a rage reaction because it’s reminding you of those past events.

Anger from the past is still stuck in your system now.

That anger is getting activated now as a result of something that’s happening in the present that reminds you of of the past.

How to Work with Rage

Giving yourself the opportunity to express this anger and let it move through your system in a safe space is the key here.

Allowing yourself to fully voice the anger inside and feel it as it moves through allows it to release from your system.

Often that rage happened in the past when our needs weren’t getting met. So if you can heal those past wound by meeting your unmet needs, often the rage will resolve.

How to Work with Rage

Giving yourself the opportunity to express this anger and let it move through your system in a safe space is the key here.

Allowing yourself to fully voice the anger inside and feel it as it moves through allows it to release from your system.

Often that rage happened in the past when our needs weren’t getting met. So if you can heal those past wound by meeting your unmet needs, often the rage will resolve.

“My anger caused my ex-girlfriend to break up with me. I wanted to know what to do so that in my next relationship I could be less angry and more present. David helped me take responsibility for my anger, make healthier boundaries, and feel more confident in myself. I don’t get angry as often, and if I do I can move through it.”

P.N.

Client Success Stories

“Growing up, I wasn’t allowed to be angry at home. When my parents were angry, they would throw things and scream at each other. As a result, I felt really uncomfortable with anger. He helped me become comfortable with my emotions, including anger, and to work with them in my life, rather than avoiding them. Now, when I feel angry, I know what to do and I don’t have to avoid it or stuff it down anymore.”

“Anger used to take me over. I’d say things that I regretted later and which hurt my marriage. David helped me create more space inside and to not let my anger control me anymore. He also taught me valuable communication skills to more effectively connect with my wife. Now that I understand myself and my wife better, my marriage is way more relaxed.”

“My anger caused my ex-girlfriend to break up with me. I wanted to know what to do so that in my next relationship I could be less angry and more present. David helped me take responsibility for my anger, make healthier boundaries, and feel more confident in myself. I don’t get angry as often, and if I do I can move through it.”

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