Get familiar with your emotions and your needs. Once you’re familiar with those, you can connect more easily with your partner’s feelings and needs. Learn to ask for what you want so your needs can get met. Get comfortable asking your partner about her needs so you can show up in a way that supports connection. Take responsibility your role in the dynamic that exists right now. Once you take ownership of how you’ve been contributing, you can change how you show up to create new outcomes. This lets you move out of powerless and helplessness and into the kind of connection you’re looking for.